The 2010 EMC Classic-One For The Ages!

There was not a lot of giddy anticipation leading up to this years 2010 edition of the EMC Classic...The regular field of 6 to 8 participants had dwindled to 4 due to several athlete's personal obligations...The 5 kilometre run was canceled due to event Chairman Ed's and Scott's physical limitations...Glen C. was a last minute cancelation...Quebec Chairman Norm was four hours late and could not be reached by phone...And Honourary Chairman Lee M.,our trusty mentor and inspirational leader was not present for the first time in the three year history of the event. Things were looking quite bleak for this year's EMC,indeed...There was even talk that this may be the LAST year for the event...Until something miraculous happened...The collective few involved realized what this week-end is about...F-in Pabst Blue Ribbon and wine!...We had to uphold the tradition of the EMC Classic and carry on for the future...Vice Chairman Dan,Ed,Norm and Quebec Vice Chairman Scott did not disappoint!

Here are but a few of this year's event highlights:
-The event opening ceremonies started with the traditional handing over of the EMC trophy (by the "Keeper Of The EMC", Scott) to Chairman Ed...And the transfer of the beer cooler, symbolizing good will between Quebec and Ontario, to Vice Chairman Dan.
-Norm had not arrived as yet...And could not be reached by phone; Ed becoming ever frustrated.
-Opening ceremonies continue with Ed being handed a king can of Pabst Blue Ribbon as a gesture of our appreciation for organizing the event.
-Ed calls Norm again, leaves a message and starts to bash Norm for being a potential no show.
-Dan and Scott continue to enjoy more...and more...and more Pabst Blue Ribbon beer.
-Ed continues to bad mouth Norm for not calling and even speculates that he went to an outdoor concert.
-Two and a half hours pass...Still no word from Norm...And after 12 Pabst Blue Ribbons and some wine...We forget that Norm has not arrived yet...And that we have to play golf in 45 minutes!
-Norm, shockingly, arrives a half hour before our 3:47 p.m. tee off time...Dan and Scott proclaim there was never a doubt on his arrival...Ed admits he thought Norm had let him down.
-3:47 p.m., the 2010 EMC Classic officially starts with Team Wine, Ed and Norm; against Team Beer, Dan and Scott!
-In a best ball format, Team Beer gets off to a four hole lead in the first four holes.
-Team Wine slowly fights back with ties and wins on the next several holes...Norm surprises everyone with his grit and concentration...Scott continues to falter with his inconsistent play.
-On the 18th hole, par4, Team Wine and Team Beer are tied and it's down to the wire...There is no tomorrow for either team.
-Norm makes a decent drive just off the fairway, 200 or so yards...Scott finally participates with a 250 yard drive right down the center of the fairway.
-Norm and Ed make acceptable 2nd shots, in play but well short of the green...Scott duffs his 2nd shot...25 yards up the middle...Dan, ever the optimist, tells me not to worry, he'll make up for it...Dan's 2nd shot goes to the right...deep in the woods.
-Team Wine, 3rd shot, Norm makes the clutch shot of the day...on the green, 12 yards past the hole...Dan and Scott, feeling the pressure, make a decent 3rd shot but short of the green...Team Wine is in control.
-Team Wine 2 putt with a respectable 6...Team Beer, their morale shot, could not pull off the miracle and lose on the final hole to the Team Wine upstarts!!!
-A shocked Dan, ever the voice of reason, said it best..."In sports, you never give up and...never know what can happen"...Sage words, my friend.
-Ed and Norm, classy as always, congratulated Team Beer for a match well played...The disappointment and upset would last for hours with Team Beer...Losing was never an option.
-Then Team Beer got back to Ed's and had some wine...And Pabst Blue Ribbon!
-Suddenly, losing wasn't so bad...Heck, 2nd place is pretty good!
-Dinner was a masterpiece...Chef Ed concocted a guacamole dip that was prize winning...Sous chef Dan was solid on the grill, firing up one of the best burgers I ever had.
-Norm complimented Ed on a wholesome dinner and appreciated a home cooked meal.
-All said, a perfect meal concluding a perfect day with great friends!

WHAT WE LEARNED
-Dan's desert island songs are "Changes" by Yes!?!...And "Clocks" by Coldplay.
-Scott's is "The Last Resort" by The Eagles.
-Norm...Anything by Styx.
-Ed chose "Karma Chameleon" by Culture Club.
-Rickey Henderson is hilarious's and articulates.
-Ed has to think of others while choosing music for the after party...Johnny Cash's "Hurt" played 5 times!?!
-Norm has VERY healthy bowels.
-You always get screwed when you order waffles at a pub for breakfast.
-Always be direct with a waitress when asking for ketchup or getting a refill of coffee.
-Funniest moment: When Norm asked the Canada Tour Guide if she likes seamen!?!
-An emotional Chairman Ed declared the 2010 EMC Classic "The best EMC Classic,ever."

What The Future Holds
After breakfast on Sunday, the executive board of the EMC took a long, thoughtful walk through the grounds of the Parliament Buildings in Ottawa...Planning the future for the EMC Classic. Like the Canadian forefathers before, these dreamers and visionaries were laying the groundwork for growth and expansion. A Quebec event was talked about and possible additions of events...Even steroid testing was discussed.

In conclusion, this year's EMC was about quality not quantity...Certainly ONE FOR THE AGES!...Great friends getting together,reuniting and bonding...And hoisting a few F-in Pabst Blue Ribbons!

Randy Tieman and Montreal Canadien Fans-Pathologically Optimistic

THE MYTH

Randy Tieman,sportscaster on CTV Television in Montreal and talk show host on The Team 990 all-sports radio station is a "glass half full" kind of guy. I respect that he can take a nothing day and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile...Mary Tyler Moore would be proud! Unfortunately, Tieman's philosophy on life extends itself to Montreal's "provincial treasure"...The Montreal Canadiens...To the point where he is pathologically optimistic about this team. "I want to see what this team can do once everyone is healthy!", "Wait until Andrei Markov comes back", "We're early in the season", "We're only 10 games,20 games,40games into the season","The team will be well rested after the Olympic break...And should get better" were just a few of the optimistic chants often used by Tieman since the first game of the 2009-2010 season when Andrei Markov went down with a serious injury. Injuries befell the rest of the team all season long...And we never did see how this team could "perform and dazzle" if everyone was healthy. Now that the Canadiens have made the playoffs, the new mantra for Tieman is "Anything can happen in the playoffs...You never know who can get hot!". Tieman's battle cry is shared by another hopeful individual...THE MONTREAL CANADIEN FAN(ATIC)!

Montreal Canadien fans have the same positive outlook as Tieman, only their blind optimism is focused on one thing and one thing ONLY...The hockey team. A Montreal Canadien fan can be best descibed as schizophrenic...Showing a love for this team and its players(see:Alex Kovalev,Ottawa Senators) so powerful it can manifest itself into rage...And hate (see: Saku Koivu,Anaheim Ducks). With Canadien fans, the team comes first, before any individual player or coach. If that player or coach becomes the unfortunate target of their frustrations, not even the mighty Bob Gainey can save them from the boo birds "hiding in the shadows" ...And it is most certain that their days in Montreal are numbered. Through the years, players come and go but the team's past(see:1943-1979 seasons) glories and success live on, as if Montreal fans believe a winning season, a playoff run and Stanley Cup win is preordained and part of the fans birth right!


THE TRUTH

RANDY TIEMAN,
-Healthy or not,I think it's self evident that the Canadiens are what they are...MEDIOCRE.
-No team is ever completely healthy...So don't hold you breath.
-This is a team assembled to play just well enough to make the playoffs and appease the fan base.
-It seems that very little was planned for the FUTURE(see:Scott Gomez)of the team(see:Capologist)
-The forwards are too small(see:The Lollypop Guild in The Wizard Of Oz)and cannot compete five on five.
-The defense(Spacek,Gill,Mara,O'Byrne,Bergeron,Hamrlik)is weak and non imposing.
-Andrei Markov is not as great as advertised.
-Halak and Price are future stars;unfortunately,the "goaltender controversy" has done little for either ones confidence.
-Is making the playoffs really good for the city of Montreal?(see:Montreal Canadien Fans Riot,2008,1993,1986).
-Let's hope the Canadiens win at least one game against the Washington Capitals so Nos Glorieux can lose the series on THE ROAD.
-There's nothing wrong with OPTIMISM for, the moment...But over a prolonged period, with all we've seen of this team; all that we hold as self evident...Who's fooling who?

THE MONTREAL CANADIEN FAN(ATIC),
-Singing the "Na,na,na,goodbye" song in the first period of any game is bad timing,bad taste...And embarrassing.
-Singing the "Na,na,na,goodbye" song on April the 10th, 2010 with 2 minutes remaining in a tie game against the Leafs is embarrassing.
-Squeeking into the playoffs with 1 point and giving Nos Glorieux a standing ovation for their "achievement" is embarrassing.
-Booing Carey Price in a Canadiens loss,regadless of his strong performance is embarrassing.
-Booing the American anthem is tasteless, ignorant and...embarrassing.
-Believing that the ghosts of the Montreal Forum exist is...silly.
-And embarrassing!
-Believing that wearing the CH gives the players "secret powers" to the past is...silly.
-Rioting in the streets of Montreal after a win or a loss in the playoffs takes away from the thrill or agony of the moment...It just cheapens our belief system...And it's damn embarrassing!
-French Canadian stars Maurice Richard, Jean Beliveau and Guy Lafleur have long retired, so stop searching for the next "chosen one".
-As long as management keeps searching for a French Canadian star, the future of this team will always be compromised.
-Thinking back at how proud and efficient and victorious this storied franchise once was makes us all think...Man were Canadien fans spoiled.
-Today, fans grasp at anything that gives them a tiny, minute taste of past glories; an 8th place finish in their conference; a mediocre French Canadian player; Alex Kovalev and his resemblance in style(and hair) to The Flower...HOW FAR THE MIGHTY (FANS) HAVE FALLEN.

The Team 990 - Radio Chaos!

Montreal is rich with french and (some) english radio stations that specialize in formats such as talk shows, news and a vast variety of music. There is only one station whose format is all sports, all day long - The Team 990. Since its incarnation on May the 7th, 2001, "The Team" has strived to give Montrealers quality sports talk radio, be it hockey, baseball, football etc. Through the years, "The Team's" radio schedule has gradually shifted from ESPN shows such as Dan Patrick and Colin Cowherd, intermingled with a few local shows...to a full daily lineup of all local talent and programming. By design, the vision and goals of "The Team" were probably well thought out with this natural progression of a Montreal themed sports station. The powers that be, through unfortunate circumstance and complacency, have lost focus in their radio station. Check no further than their web page...the style and format has remained unchanged for years. Some of the shows promoted on the site, like P On Sports and Totally Broad, have been off the air for years;The Race Line Radio e-mail does not exist;Blogs are so old that dust is collecting on the last updated heading (2007). The web page is not my primary concern but it is a sign...a sign of an operation in CHAOS! After nine years, The Team 990 seems to be slipping into a state a mediocrity ...and here is why.

INABILITY TO GAIN BROADCAST RIGHTS OF THE CANADIENS AND ALOUETTES
Unfortunately, to have a true Montreal stamp on all things sports, you must have the exclusivity to what is synonymous with Montreal...and life...The Montreal Canadiens and their radio broadcast rights. How can you be a true all sports station and, after nine years, not have the play by play broadcast of the Canadiens? Does CJAD, (the rights holder)a talk radio station, have such a stranglehold on the rights? This should have been priority number one at CKGM, from day one. The other major sports team in Montreal, the CFL's Montreal Alouettes, are also broadcast on...CJAD. The Team has the broadcast rights to...The Quebec Major Junior Leagues Juniors de Montreal and the MLS's Montreal Impact...the consolation prizes.
What is sad in a pathetic sort of way is there are nights when 990 will have their Canadiens pre-game show...then start broadcasting a Juniors game. Meanwhile, the listeners have switched stations (CJAD) for the Canadiens game. How long can a radio station survive covering a major sports team, all the while remaining on the fringe?
The broadcast rights of the Canadiens and Alouettes notwithstanding,what gets lost in the mix is the exclusive interviews that CJAD inherits with their broadcast rights. The Team ends up with generic media scrum interviews and tidbits of gossip.
To be fair, 990 did have the broadcast rights of the Montreal Expos and did a phenominal job of covering the team. We all know what happened to the Expos in '04 and in many ways, 990 has never recovered from the huge gap that their exodus created...not to mention the hole in the summer schedule.
If The Team fails to get these rights within a year or two, 990 on the a.m. dial may be playing the tunes of Slim Whitman and Conway Twitty...country music being the prerequisite in all format changes.
MEDIOCRE BROADCASTERS AND TALENT
Yes, The Team has some talented and unique broadcasters - Mitch Melnick, Elliott Price, Denis Casavant and Rod Francis - all capable of finding work in any market. They all have one thing in common...radio expertise and savvy. At The Team, this is the exception rather than the rule. Many of the on-air talent is not "ready for prime time" or, in the case of one broadcaster, just plain obnoxious. Let's rate the "other" main players:
- Sean Starr: Talks a good game, if you can understand him. For some reason, Starr feels that talking faster means you are more interesting. Talking fast usually leads to tripping over words and mispronounciations. Maybe it's those darn vowels that give him the fits. Whatever it is, I get frustrated just hearing his voice...and lose focus as a listener. Starr has some interesting tidbits on statistics but he should lose the overused cliches like, "the sexy pick is"...pleeease!
Grade: C-
- Tony Marinaro:
Ted Tevan want to be, minus a personality. A Monday Morning Quarterback if there ever was one. "I predicted that last week" is a common line used by Tony, as if his career is going to explode because he was right about a win or loss prediction. Fine...bravo Tony! You're a genius. A prediction gone wrong? Suddenly he turns into The Fonz (I was wwwrrron...no, can't say it). Canadiens win, get ready for the Stanley Cup; they lose, it becomes personal with Marinaro. He picks on players with a cruelty that borders on immature. At the beginning of the Canadiens' season, Scott Gomez was struggling with his play. For weeks, Marinaro had a schtick where he'd call out: Scoott! Gomez! Come here boy! Where are you!? There's the goal! (Like calling for a dog) The routine was borderline racist and halted suddenly (mamagement?). There is nothing wrong with being controversial and edgy but when the motives of the person are so mean spirited and loathsome; selfish and egotistical;interrupting and talking over people...you know Tony Marinaro cares only about Tony Marinaro...everyone else is a threat to his career. Why so insecure, Tony?
Grade:D-
Sean Campbell: Campbell knows his sports and can talk...and talk...and talk. Man, can he talk. With Campbell, a sentence can turn into a chapter very quickly. When a person over informs, it puts the listener into a sort of trance and the zone out occurs. You're listening but...not really. All you can think of is "Man, when is he going to end his 'sentence'"? Advise? Condense, shorten...stop talking. Hope he changes because Campbell is actually an amazing talent...But sometimes less (talk) is more.
Grade:C+
Andie Bennett: Seems like a sweet person but maybe her talents are best served in another medium. Mainstream sport is not her forte. Bennett covers the Canadiens practices and does the sports updates on Melnick's afternoon drive show. She asks a lot of questions about sports but doesn't have much of an opinion or interesting thoughts. After seven years on the job, I don't get the impression that she has improved on her sports knowledge. Research some sports history or watch the DVD on the Canada/Russia '72 series...or something. Give the listener something interesting. But please, don't tell me that Andie Bennett is your most qualified person to cover THE MONTREAL CANADIENS. Once again, the listeners are being cheated of quality sports coverage.
Grade:D-
Personality:A
LEGITIMATE BUSINESS OR TAX RIGHT OFF?
Does CTV GlobeMedia see this radio station as a viable money generator or just a tax exemption? CTV has owned The Team 990 since June of '07 and in that time, there is no evidence of taking 990 to the next level as a broadcaster. Commercials for events and shows are aired weeks after the fact; sound clips and computer noises spontaneously come on in the middle of broadcasts; the crappy web site; on air talent showing no signs of broadcast improvement or correcting bad habits, such as using "words" like ie.: "Uh", "ummm", "like" and "I mean" between real words. Is anyone coaching these people or is 990 happy with the status quo? The record shows yes...yes indeed.

Message To NASCAR....The Exodus Has Begun!

Week after week,we hope that we witness a competitive race on the NASCAR circuit...This is why we,as fans,refuse to abandon this sport...Week after week,NASCAR,Fox and the track disappoints the fans...In the last five years,NASCAR Inc. has raked in the money,assuming the sport would sell itself...Throughout this period,they forgot one important goal;to keep the sport ENTERTAINING...The "trading paint" ads are an illusion used to keep us all thinking "This will be the race that brings us back as fans"...A desperate plea by a very out of touch NASCAR.You know what NASCAR...The fans are getting RESTLESS...The exodus has begun but it is not too late for REDEMPTION!

CTV and Their Happy Place

Today was the last day of the exhaustive Torch Relay culminating with all day coverage of the run by CTV,the rights holder of the 2010 Olympics.CTV went on the air at 5:55,with footage of the first torch bearer crossing the Lions Gate Bridge and planned to continue covering the event until the torch reached its final destination at B.C. Place...And the network did just what they promised.CTV broke its coverage to report that a luger had been seriously hurt during a qualifying run in Whistler,by virtually flying off the track at one of the high speed corners.Maybe 5 minutes of air time was dedicated to the news...Then CTV continued its coverage of HAPPY LAND and the torch relay.What CTV forgot to mention is that a tragedy had occurred at the bobsled/luge track in Whistler...Nodar Kumaratashvili had died of his injuries...Breaking news on American news networks(MSNBC,CNN)but ignored by CTV,the primary Olympic broadcaster.I understand that the show must go on but when viewers are watching "Joe Smith" run with the torch,knowing full well that an Olympic tragedy had occured before the games could get started,and CTV hosts come on air with those happy faces...You couldn't help but feel a little sick to your stomach.

Gainey QUITS As Canadiens G.M.? I Think Not!

The Canadiens press conference on February 8th was nothing but corporate
spin...Bob Gainey claimed he was tired of doing the job and had decided in December that he was not continuing as general manager of the Montreal Canadiens...With 3 months left in the season!In July,2009,Gainey changed the face of this team with ELEVEN new player signings.He seemed optimistic with the teams future.Of course the signings proved to be average at best and questionable...Why so many huge contracts,for so many years,for so many average players?Gainey panicked at the thought of not being able to sign anyone...And this mediocre team,with NO cap room,is the end result.Why would Gainey leave his post when his work was clearly never finished.Bob Gainey never quit anything in his life.
...Gainey read from his notes because nothing he said was from
the HEART...He was forced out as G.M. and the most delicate transition
the Canadiens' brass could invent to save face for the Canadiens' and
Gainey was for Bob to stay on as an assistant to Pierre Gauthier for the
remainder of the season...Yet he claimed in the ensuing weeks that he will be watching the Olympics and relaxing...If Gainey's heart is truly not into his
work,then why is he still being entrusted to make vital decisions for
the organization...The truth is that Gainey no longer works for the Canadiens and will be as visible as Howard Hughes was.